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Dorie Meek
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| Dorie Meek is director of the Infant & Family Support Program, provided by Saint John's Health Center in partnership with the Santa Monica-Malibu Unified School District. Meek answers questions concerning children ages birth to 5 years old.
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Articles by this Author
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Dear Dorie
Weening wee little ones from the rush
Dear Dorie,
For the past few weeks, I’ve been really flexible with our nighttime routine. Now that the holidays are over, do you have any tips for getting the kids back in the swing of things?
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Dear Dorie
Seeking a smooth transition
Dear Dorie,
I am getting ready to go back to work after being home for about a year and a half. I’m very worried about my daughter being able to handle my absence. Any suggestions?
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Dear Dorie
Toddler finds herself with words
Dear Dorie,
I’ve noticed my 3-year-old keeps referring to herself in the third person. For example, “Mary doesn’t feel good” or “Mary likes the toy.” Is this normal? Should I go along with it or try to change her behavior?
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Dear Dorie
Watch, wince, repeat to get some Zzzs
Dear Dorie,
I have a 9-month old daughter who wakes up crying every two hours or so. I am exhausted. What can I do to help her learn to stay asleep?
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Dear Dorie
It’s a small world after all
Dear Dorie,
I am a working parent and I have to travel a lot. I am called to Europe at least twice a year. I’m considering bringing my family with me on the next trip. My husband would be able to sightsee with the children during the day and I’ll be done by late afternoon. I have a preschooler and a second-grader that would miss a week of school. Is it worth it?
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Dear Dorie
Sprat didn’t know Jack about portions
Dear Dorie,
I’m worried that my 2-year-old is not eating enough. She’s more of a nibbler really and seems to eat less than most of her friends. I try to give her a lot of options and repeat the favorites, but it doesn’t seem to make a difference. Is there a guideline for this?
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Dear Dorie
Should have named her baby ‘Chuck’
Dear Dorie,
My toddler seems to enjoy eating, but continues to throw things off the high chair. I’m more than willing to give him appropriate things to throw in the right place, but why does this continue to happen?
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Dear Dorie
Just say ‘no’ to nannies
Dear Dorie,
I have two questions about child care. What is your advice regarding a nanny at home versus a child care center for a working parent? And, how do you feel about different gender baby-sitters?
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Dear Dorie
Peek-a-boo with playmate too?
Dear Dorie,
My preschooler has an imaginary playmate. I know this is OK but “Sengy” is very active and has a really different personality from my son. This concerns me. Do I need to intervene in any way and, if so, how?
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Dear Dorie
Too many toddlers in the sandbox
Dear Dorie,
I have a 3-year-old daughter. Yesterday, she was with two of her friends — they all play together beautifully one on one, but with all three of them the dynamic got a little ‘exclusive’ with my daughter. The other girls didn’t seem to be deliberately excluding her, she just wasn’t in their groove and got very sad and said to me, “They don’t want to play with me.”
I explained that they did want to play with her, but she just had to go along with their game if she wanted to play. We left the area for a few minutes, she sulked a little, and then we went back. I let her approach them on her own and after a few minutes all was well. I like to stay out of her play unless there is a major issue, but I’m not sure how to handle this.
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Dear Dorie
Chew on this: No need to rush solids
Dear Dorie,
Can you tell me your thoughts regarding the introduction of solid foods for a 4-month old?
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Dear Dorie
Knowing when to say ‘wean’
Dear Dorie,
My daughter is two years, two months old and I am still breastfeeding. I had planned from the beginning to let breastfeeding “play out naturally”, letting her wean herself when she was ready, if possible. She is still very much interested in the “nunu” and usually wants her free hand all over the free breast — this is getting annoying and uncomfortable for me. I can usually work it out, but I just thought that by now, she would be a little less attached to my breasts. What’s going on with her?
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Dear Dorie
Bowled over by toddler’s progress
Dear Dorie,
I’ve noticed my one-year old seems to be potty training on her own. Is this possible or just wishful thinking? She seems to really know when she’s going to “go” and I can even take her to the potty without upsetment. Any thoughts?
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Dear Dorie
Don’t be giving junior a hand
Dear Dorie,
When does parenting a toddler change from “setting limits” to real discipline? What are the forms of discipline being promoted/taught by the “experts?”
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Dear Dorie
Mr. Sandman, bring him a dream
Dear Dorie,
I have a beautiful 2-year-old boy who won’t sleep through the night, no matter what I do. A good night is one or two wake-ups and a bad night can be three or four. Is this normal? How am I supposed to help him stay asleep?
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Dear Dorie
Whoa, Nelly: Pull in the reins
Dear Dorie,
I have two young children — 2 years old and 5 years old — and just got back from a five-day vacation with my husband. We really indulged with staying up late, sleeping in, theme parks, kids sleeping in our bed, a little bit more sugar than usual. Basically, a great vacation but I am now paying the price big time. Is this temporary or did I really set regression in full mode?
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Dear Dorie
Boys will be boys, after all
Dear Dorie,
Can you give me some information about the latest trends in parenting regarding the differences in boys and girls? I have one of each, both below 5 years old, and I want to present a balanced environment. It’s pretty obvious that there are differences in approach already, but do I emphasize what they’re naturally interested in or push to broaden their experience?
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Dear Dorie
Sometimes moms need a timeout
Dear Dorie,
I’m gearing up for Mother’s Day with a 3-year-old, a 7-year-old and a husband who works really long hours with frequent business trips. We’ll all be together on that Sunday but to be totally honest, I just want to be alone. I’m not trying to feel ungrateful or unappreciative — I love my family very much. I’m just wondering if there are any other moms out there who feel like me and if you have any advice for the big day?
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Dear Dorie
Attending to the ‘Big 8s’
Dear Dorie,
I have a newborn baby boy and he’s doing really great. He’s eating well and growing each week. I feel so lucky to have him. The only problem is that he’s crying every few hours and I am getting really tired. I know he needs to eat a lot, but is there anything else that is going on? My Mother is helping on the weekends, so I’m getting a little rest then, but the rest of the week I’m basically on my own.
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Dear Dorie
Nipping feeding concerns in bud
Dear Dorie,
I’m breast-feeding my two-month old and I’m not sure he’s ever getting to the “hind” milk before switching sides. Should I force him to continue on that side even when it feels empty, just in case? Should I switch him back and forth at different feedings and walk around lop-sided? Any information would be greatly appreciated.
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Dear Dorie
Baby’s first Banana Boat
Dear Dorie,
We’re getting into warm weather and I have a 6-month old baby with fair skin. What is your opinion on sunscreen products for infants?
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Dear Dorie
Asleep behind the wheel
Dear Dorie,
I have a 3-year-old daughter in preschool. She is healthy, active and sleeps well at night. I have noticed that if I am driving with her around 1:30 in the afternoon she will fall asleep for at least an hour. But if I’m not driving, she won’t take a nap. Since she falls asleep easily in the car, doesn’t this mean that she still needs a nap? How can I get her to nap in the afternoons without driving?
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Dear Dorie
The straight and marrow
Dear Dorie,
My 18-month-old is waking up at least four times a night. Sometimes he only sleeps for 20 minutes at a time before waking up crying. My pediatrician says that he’s just a bad sleeper and he will grow out of it. Is there anything else I can do to help him settle down for the night? Should I let him cry it out? Any suggestions are appreciated.
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Dear Dorie
Dear Dorie,
I’ve heard a lot about the importance of art for preschoolers, is there anything a parent can do for infants or young toddlers? Is it really that important?
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Dear Dorie
Strained dinner and a show
Dear Dorie,
I’ve noticed a lot of summer movies for kids this year. What’s the right age for watching a film out of the house?
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Dear Dorie
Roller boy stuck in neutral
Dear Dorie,
I have a beautiful 5-month-old baby boy. He started rolling both front to back and back to front a month ago. But now he doesn’t do it anymore. Is that normal? He loves it when we play with him and roll around, but he doesn’t voluntarily try on his own. He does tummy time really well all the time now so I know it is not a strength issue. Should I be doing something about this?
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Dear Dorie
Beach blankie bingo
Dear Dorie,
I am wondering about beach safety for my toddlers this summer. Is there anything I can do to prepare for the beach days? I’ve looked into swim lessons, but that’s not really my concern as they’re going to play in the shallow waves all day anyway.
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Dear Dorie
Little girl drawn to conclusions
Dear Dorie,
I read to my 1 1/2-year-old daughter every day, and have since her birth. Lately, she seems to flip through the pages before I finish the sentence or paragraph, so I’m not really finishing the story. Should I make her wait until I finish the page or let her play with the book this way?
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Dear Dorie
Help junior avoid school daze
Dear Dorie,
My toddler is getting ready to start preschool in September. The school gave me a packet with suggestions for transitioning him to class, like visiting the classroom and reading books about preschool. Any other suggestions?
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Dear Dorie
Kids will be kids
Dear Dorie,
Can you give me some information about the latest trends in parenting regarding the differences in boys and girls? I have one of each, both below 5 years old, and I want to present a balanced environment. It’s pretty obvious that there are differences in approach already, but do I emphasize what they’re naturally interested in or push to broaden their experience?
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»
Dear Dorie
Kids will be kids
Dear Dorie,
Can you give me some information about the latest trends in parenting regarding the differences in boys and girls? I have one of each, both below 5 years old, and I want to present a balanced environment. It’s pretty obvious that there are differences in approach already, but do I emphasize what they’re naturally interested in or push to broaden their experience?
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Dear Dorie
Keep abreast of the situation
Dear Dorie,
My 18-month-old is breast-feeding at night only, and I’d like to begin weaning her from the middle-of-the-night feedings. Any suggestions on how to put her back to sleep without feeding?
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Dear Dorie
Case of the clap is a good thing
Dear Dorie,
My 11- month-old just started clapping his hands on his own. He’ll do it anywhere and anytime. Should I discourage or encourage the behavior at the appropriate settings?
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Dear Dorie
Pencil pushers come in all sizes
Dear Dorie,
I’m a stay-at-home parent with two children under the age of three. I’m interested in delaying the school experience for as long as possible. When am I required to send my children to school? Most of our playgroup friends are entering preschool at age three, this seems awfully early to me. Can I wait until four or five without hurting my children?
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Dear Dorie
Sugar highs and lows
Dear Dorie,
Starting with the fall festivals and ending with Halloween, my daughter is on a sugar high. What am I supposed to do with all this candy? I don’t want to throw it away, but I don’t want it around the house either.
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Dear Dorie
What’s eating baby blue?
Dear Dorie,
My 6-month-old baby boy has just started eating cereal. My pediatrician recommends two to three days of one type of cereal to watch for allergies, followed by veggies, fruit and meats. Other than a rash, what am I looking for? Also, can I mix the fruit and cereal together or does it have to be one item per meal? How many times can I feed him during the day?
Finally, I’ve been mixing the cereal with breast milk. When do I switch to water or formula?
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Dear Dorie
Everybody does their share
Dear Dorie,
How can I get my 3-year-old to help clean up the messes he makes? I don’t want to go overboard, but I’m tired of feeling like a street sweeper all day. Please don’t say leave it alone — the whole house can be destroyed in one hour. Help!
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Dear Dorie
Parents, chew on this
Dear Dorie,
My 2-year-old is a biter. When she gets frustrated or angry, she responds with a bite to anything or anyone near. She’s got a mouthful of the dog, her friends and my shoulder. Help! What do I do to get her to stop?
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Dear Dorie
The situation isn’t working
Dear Dorie,
The youngest of my three children is 18 months old and I’d like to go back to work. How do I begin the search for child care?
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Dear Dorie
Avoid the toe-jam for toddlers
Dear Dorie,
My 13-month-old is starting to walk and I’m looking for shoes that he’ll keep on his feet. Some of my friends have said barefoot is better, some have said that I must get his feet ready with shoes. Is there any majority opinion on this?
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Dear Dorie
Dear Dorie,
My 13-month-old just started walking, but she seems to fall down after just a few steps. Should I encourage more crawling or just pick her up again?
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Dear Dorie
New year for kids
Dear Dorie,
We’re coming up on New Year’s Eve and I’m at a loss (again) for what to do with my toddlers. I have a 2-year old and a 4-year old and they are both very active. Any suggestions?
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Dear Dorie
Worn out in her son’s wake
Dear Dorie,
What have I done wrong? Why can’t we get our 8-month-old son to sleep earlier than 11 p.m.? When he does go to sleep, he only stays down for about two hours or so. I can’t second-guess myself now, but I am a little concerned.
I am not always thrilled with their idea of letting him cry it out. Is there anything I can do to help this without resorting to ignoring his cries?
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Dear Dorie
Something to chew on
Dear Dorie,
When is it OK to give Cheerios to my 9-month old? She has two top teeth and two bottom, and I’ve seen other parents give them out but can’t find anything in writing.
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