> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://www.smdp.com/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # Buzz’in Santa Monica - URL: https://www.smdp.com/buzzin-santa-monica-20060821/ - Published: 2006-08-21T15:00:00.000Z - Updated: 2026-10-25T00:44:08.000Z - Author: Guest Author - Tags: Opinion, Promenade, #archive-import, Homeless Buzz (büz) v. buzzed, buzz·ing, buzz·es 1\. confusion of activity and gossip, 2\. to be noisy with activity, 3\. to talk, often excitedly, in low tones. Slang 1\. Excited interest or attention. 2\. To move quickly and busily; bustle.... Buzz has been busy this past week traveling to the Midwest and making the rounds in his favorite stomping grounds — Santa Monica, aka the city by the sea — “a happy place for happy people.” People seemed so happy that Buzz wonders if all those call-ins to the editor tipping her off to the chemtrails in the sky are actually in fact spraying lithium upon us...... Santa Monica’s moniker “home of the homeless” was once again highlighted this past week... what would it be without sharing the homeless antic of week...? Of course, Buzz doesn’t like to see human suffering, but some homeless are purely walking the streets on their own volition, and sadly sometimes they do provide entertainment. Not a very PC statement, but neither is the Convention and Visitor’s Bureau take on our homeless population, which is that they provide “character” to the town. So this week’s character/messy vitality/entertaining homeless antic comes from the Third Street Promenade (where else?) Buzz has learned that the dinosaurs spitting water aren’t just for aesthetics or landscape architecture. One man made good use out of the one near Broadway by taking a shower under the public “art”... another was seen using it as a toilet. During the second instance, a community safety officer standing 100 feet away was too occupied to notice because he was giving a kid a ticket for skateboarding. It’s all about priorities...... On a need to know basis... Buzz has caught wind that there appears to be a wide-spread affection for schnauzers at City Hall. In one of his largest scoops yet, Buzz has learned that the city manager, the assistant city manager and the city finance director are all proud owners of schnauzers. Coincidence? Maybe. Maybe not. But since the ankle nippers are known to be animated but obedient, reliable and affectionate, intelligent but headstrong and need firm and consistent training, it doesn’t surprise Buzz in the least bit that our leaders have chosen these particular companions. As it’s been said before, owners take on the characteristics of their pets. Let’s just hope they don’t start looking like them...... On the political front... the Buzz around town is that SMPD Police Chief Jim Butts had considered a run for city council in Inglewood. Through the always-reliable grapevine, Buzz heard the chief pulled papers at the prompting of several high-ranking city officials. But now that he is about to head up security at LA’s four airports, the chief realized holding political office might be a bit too much to chew on. That’s too bad because Inglewood could use a good cleansing... but first let’s get the terrorists, chief! On another note, Buzz now really knows why the police chief is leaving our fair city. The airport job offers many perks, one of them being a vehicle of Butts’ choice. He went with a Chevy Tahoe. Big car. Big job. Big guy...... In the real world... not all people are as concerned with what they put in their bodies as we are in health conscious Santa Monica. Buzz was reminded of that as he traveled to a certain city in the Midwest last weekend. He found himself in a monstrous discount grocery store — a popular place even at midnight for those corn-fed, milk-toast Midwesterners. As he walked the aisles taking stock of the immense inventory, Buzz was hit with a reality check: Santa Monicans’ tastebuds are a tad different than those in middle America. Strolling the “meat” section, Buzz was stopped in his tracks when he saw the variety of bologna offered. As far as the eye could see there were packages of bologna — 26 varieties in all. After surveying the mystery meat, Buzz counted 37 rows of bologna, stacked four high and six deep. Nearly 1,000 packages and 10,000 slices of BOLOGNA. What gross public display of a gastrointestinal mess. Sorry, Oscar... “My bologna has a first name, it’s O-S- C-A-R. My bologna has a second name, it’s M- A-Y-E-R. Oh, I love to eat it every day, and if you ask me why, I’ll say, ‘Cause Oscar Mayer has a way with B- O-L-O-G-N-A.” *Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on August 21, 2006.* [Read the original PDF.](https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/smdp%5Fbackissues/082106.pdf?ref=smdp.com)