> ## Content Index > Fetch the complete content index at: https://www.smdp.com/llms.txt > Use this file to discover other available public pages before exploring further. # Hurry up there, Romeo - URL: https://www.smdp.com/hurry-up-there-romeo/ - Published: 2007-02-14T16:00:00.000Z - Updated: 2026-10-24T00:03:40.000Z - Author: Guest Author - Tags: Opinion, Santa Monica, #archive-import enjoy the assurance that they will, in one hour, meet numerous people of varying eth-nicities, ages and creepiness levels with the chance to follow up later online. At this time last week, I had no plans for Valentine’s Day, let alone a follow up relationship. Tonight, I have promising dinner plans, all thanks to my spontaneous jaunt into the world of Hurry Date. But single women in Santa Monica don’t exactly have it made. Out of the 11 guys I met while speed dating, only a handful matched my desired level of social aptitude. Guys rotated around the intimate bar room, decorated with expansive mirrors, red tea candles and matching walls. One by one, they paused for a five-minute conversation — or sales pitch — on why they deserved my attention. I jotted a quick note on whether I wanted to see number so-and-so again and off they floated. I didn’t expect my evening to turn into a chance to give dating advice to my fellow Santa Monica singles, but now I can’t resist. First impressions are crucial in speed dating. To stand out in a crowd in a positive way, you must demonstrate that you’re unique, but in no way desperate for a date. Case in point: One slightly balding guy carried a note-taking clipboard around to the dating “stations” and openly shared that three months of solid speed dating hadn’t turned up any good results. Not smooth. As far as attire goes, here’s a word of advice for the gentlemen: Leave the jean shorts at home. Datable denim means jeans, skirts or maybe a jacket, but never shorts. If I dress up for you, you’d better not dress up for a hike. Showing up wasted is not attractive, no matter how many moves you assume it will add to your game. Sure, you can nurse a bottle of Corona, but please don’t rely on six shots of vodka to make you irresistible. Slurring words as you ask if I like guacamole, olives and fish doesn’t exactly turn me on. Even if the conversation does turn to odd culinary preferences, in the speed dating arena, you don’t have to worry about a woman giving you the cold shoulder or oh-so-cleverly evading you in the restroom. For five minutes, you have her seemingly undivided attention. Yet for some reason, these guys just didn’t seem to use it wisely. They couldn’t keep their stories fresh, and they all ran together. I couldn’t tell the yoga fanatic apart from the engineer who stared at his computer screen all day. Guy after guy sat down and asked the same questions over and over:“Where do you live?” “What do you do?” “What do you do when you’re not working or speed dating?” It’s a good rule of thumb to try to find common ground, preferably without appearing too frantic. This worked for me and my Valentine’s Day date, who happens to be a fellow USC Trojan. But try to find these commonalties without asking the typical, boring questions. To do this, a guy must be creative and able the think on his feet — that is without weirding me out. Actually make me think, and I’ll award you extra cool points. Out of desperation, I asked the guys to tell me something they hadn’t told anyone else in the room. My quest for random facts left way too many guys fumbling for words they couldn’t just pull from a can of lines rehearsed on the drive over. I do hand it to the guys, though, for carrying the conversation fairly effortlessly, even when I threw a few tricks their way. For me to find a guy attractive, he must interact with ease in unpredictable social situations. To check one guy’s conversational skills under pressure, I responded as long-windedly as possible to his persistent questions, but silently refused to ask any of my own. A brief awkward pause and he was on his way to another question. Another guy managed to stay oblivious to an experiment in which I talked in sentences or questions of only two words or less. He obviously liked to hear himself speak. For me, the real test was the optional post-speed dating mixing. Most of the guys bolted as soon as they lost their excuse to talk to the women. But I stuck around and mingled with a few of the guys that left positive impressions on me. Might I suggest, however, that a guy not waltz up to a couple who has already paired off and expect to jump into the conversation? If a woman needs to escape a conversation, she will. As much as you’d like to think so, she doesn’t need to be saved. Only step in if she gives the clear signal combination of eye contact, nod and smile. Luckily, I didn’t have to resort to my escape mechanism. A quick exchange of phone numbers with my guy, and I knew I’d be set for a happy Valentine’s Day. *Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on February 14, 2007.* [Read the original PDF.](https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/smdp%5Fbackissues/021407.pdf?ref=smdp.com)