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# Life in Santa Monica: Good, bad and ugly
- URL: https://www.smdp.com/life-in-santa-monica-good-bad-and-ugly/
- Published: 2006-06-16T15:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-25T00:16:00.000Z
- Author: Guest Author
- Tags: Opinion, Pier, #archive-import

*By GUEST COMMENTARY BY JACK NEWORTH*

This being my first column, I thought I’d introduce myself and look back on all the changes I’ve seen in Santa Monica over the past years. My first official visit was when I was 2\. My aunt took me to the Ocean Park Pier where, to my horror, I laid eyes on “The Laughing Lady,”a life-size, mechanical puppet. Picture Sandra Bernhard in a fright wig, pop-ping out of a haunted house and cackling hysterically. Actually, don’t picture it, I try not to.

In the summers, my mother would drive my sister and me to the beach in our two-toned Pontiac Chieftain filled with inner tubes, rafts, Nose-Kote, plastic pails and shovels — my poor mother. The ride west on Pico Boulevard passed the Woodlawn Cemetery on 14th Street where my sister and I competed to see who could hold their breath the longest. The point was the loser would wind up at Woodlawn. Frankly, it’s remarkable Woodlawn Cemetery hasn’t been turned into Woodlawn Condo Village by now.

The highlight of the drive occurred on the hill above 11th,with our first glimpse of the ocean.Minutes later we’d be in the water which was so clean you could see your feet, and even fish swimming around. The upside of today’s pollution? Fewer fish in your way and you can get your daily requirement of mercury if you inadvertently swallow a gulp of sea water.

My father worked long hours but once in a while he’d take us fishing at the pier. Barracuda, perch, mackerel, tomcods, halibut and various crabs were delicious, and, as opposed to today, edible. Santa Monica felt like a real beach town. These days, with all the development, sometimes it feels like Westwood by the sea.

As teen-agers, my buddies and I would take the bus to the beach — mom quit chauffeuring for a paying gig. All day at Muscle Beach: Riding waves, eating at Honest John’s hot dog stand and watching body builders toss bikini-clad girls around like cupie dolls. Honest John had been a professional wrestler and had a handle-bar mustache with points so sharp they could poke your eye out. That was a mother’s big fear in those days, an eye getting poked out. No skin cancer, gang-bangers or terrorists. This was before JFK died or the war in Viet Nam. It was the beach version of Mayberry.

As a senior in high school I developed a passion for body surfing — as opposed to a passion for homework. Surfboards were twice the size and four times the weight of today. The shout on the beach was, “surf’s up.” Today, with cell phones, the shout is, “can you hear me now?”

The movie craze in Santa Monica was big-wave surf documentaries at the Santa Monica Civic Auditorium, with the blazing guitar and heavy bass of a Dick Dale and the Deltones’ soundtrack. These days at the civic there are antique and cat shows — nothing against antiques, or cats, or even antique cats.

Santa Monica used to be laid back. Now it’s so congested that a drive through downtown is best when you’re on the bus. But some things are better. The beach was becoming an ashtray, so they banned smoking. I’m hoping the Promenade is next. Female lifeguards was another improvement. However, the police ATVs that race up and down the beach are noisy, emit fumes and are annoying, especially when the cops idle checking out a girl in a thong. Am I complaining or envious?

As a city we are culturally more diverse and that’s good. And there are more art galleries and movie theaters. I also think local government is improved from the “good ol’ boys” era, though to get elected they probably spend 50 times more.

Maybe I’m just not a big fan of progress? In fact as I reflect back, probably the biggest benefit of all these changes in Santa Monica, for me personally... no more Laughing Lady on the pier. (Jack Neworth is a freelance writer. He)

*Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on June 16, 2006.* [Read the original PDF.](https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/smdp%5Fbackissues/061606.pdf?ref=smdp.com)