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# The one thing that Los Angeles is not is comforting
- URL: https://www.smdp.com/the-one-thing-that-los-angeles-is-not-is-comforting/
- Published: 2005-01-04T16:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-24T22:57:31.000Z
- Author: Guest Author
- Tags: Opinion, Montana, #archive-import

*By IN LA BY HEIDI MANTEUFFEL*

If I could say one thing that LA is not, it would be comfort.

LA is fast-paced, trendy and tries painfully to be forever young. I promise it can be exhilarating to know that any second you could run into a Rob Lowe or Demi Moore, and even more so that your friends will be believe you did. But by no means is LA comfort and by that measure, home.

Many may make LA their home. I have. But I don’t find comfort seeing women twice my age dressing like my friends in college and dating my ex-boyfriends. And it makes me uneasy quite honestly to be sneered at by clerks on Montana Avenue who sell clothes at the price of a down payment on a home.

I don’t like to wake up to the sound of strange men sorting through glass, and garbage trucks picking up the waste of low-carb, high-stress diets. Life doesn’t have to be so noisy, and I promise you it isn’t everywhere.

A comfortable city to me is St. Paul, Minn. People are known as egregiously friendly, striking up conversations in airport bathrooms. The quality of life on many a survey is high — its residents are reportedly happy and the city is clean and safe.

In such an environment one can let down their protective Chanel waistline, immaculately trim bodies and rest in the comfort of being themselves.

But I don’t see this in LA. I see people desperately wanting to be special, noticed. And honestly it makes me sad. Sure, most of us are not as Buddhist as we should be. We don’t want to deal with the pain of human suffering. With botox, younger clothes and a team of plastic surgeons, we shun away any conception of the idea that we too some day will die.

I’m not Buddhist but I don’t adhere to LA teaching either. Happiness doesn’t come from success and exploited sexuality. It comes in a comfort and confidence in yourself.

Sounds simple right? Of course it’s not. That’s why arrogance/self consciousness and eating disorders run rampant. We are the only nation that is so conspicuously overweight yet adores celebrities unable to produce a menstruation cycle. In layman’s terms, we are f’d up.

Are you looking to me to find a solution? You shouldn’t. Not because it’s insulting to be insulted by someone so young and inexperienced but because that’s wherein the problem lies.

I am not saying that I have never been sucked in by the glitz and glamour of LA. I admit I too had the unmistakably flat stomach, tanned exterior and perfectly coifed, immorally priced hair. But in the passing of years and misdirected compliments of some that I should be a model (by size and not looks), I finally realized that I had gone too far.

Three years later I sit here paler, larger and unmistakably happier. No more talent scouts approaching me for modeling jobs — no more dizziness in life. And that in itself gives me great peace.

I don’t find comfort in the exteriors of LA but I do find comfort in the fact that I have battled with the outside stimuli provided for me, and for the moment, have won. (If you want to tell Heidi what brings you comfort, send her an e-mail at).

*Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on January 4, 2005.* [Read the original PDF.](https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/smdp%5Fbackissues/010405.pdf?ref=smdp.com)