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# Two-for-ones, it seems, are too good to be true
- URL: https://www.smdp.com/two-for-ones-it-seems-are-too-good-to-be-true/
- Published: 2007-10-09T15:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-25T01:05:48.000Z
- Author: Guest Author
- Tags: Opinion, Promenade, #archive-import

*By Ron Prosky Guest Commentary*

I WAS NEAR THE THIRD STREET Promenade the other day and ran into a couple of girls I know. We exchanged the conventional chit-chat when they mentioned they were just returning to work after indulging in half-price sushi. Truth be told, I couldn’t care less about their eating habits, but they’re both pretty cute, so I pretended to show interest (I know, men are pigs). Anyway, I got to thinking as I continued strolling through this beautiful little city of mine, and it occurred to me that certain things just don’t make sense. Half-price sushi? We’re talking about raw fish here.

Are you really interested in saving a couple of bucks when it comes to raw meat marching through your intestines? I’m a cheapskate by nature, but when it comes to raw fish, I am more than willing to pay full fare!

This took me back a week or two, when I was reading the L.A. Weekly (or one of those off-the-beaten-path papers) and saw an advertisement that read “Lasik Eye Correction: Buy one eye, get the second eye free.” Call me crazy, but when it comes to a high-power laser penetrating my retina, again, I’m willing to pay full price, no enticing deals necessary to win me over. What strikes me as strange is the fact that here’s a well-trained physician who would actually consider placing such an ad, after all, I’d guess the bulk of his clientele consists of relatively well-educated folks who can decipher a good deal from a questionable one.

Who knows? He may be the best in town... be sure to let me know how it went.

Whether it’s “2 for 1,” “half price,” “all u can eat” or simply one heck of a deal, certain items and services just don’t merge well in these situations. Two-for-one car washes are great, half-price brake service isn’t. Half-price laser hair removal, I’m sure is one sweet deal, but apply breast augmentation to that very same offer and I’d sooner jump out of a perfectly good airplane with a parachute I paid half price for at my local Goodwill.

Factory incentives from your local car dealership? It doesn’t matter, you’re getting taken however you slice that pie. What they lose on the sale price they’ll make up for 10 times over on future service, parts and labor, but they have the “Deal of the Century” for you and they won’t be beat; not to mention the free hot dogs, popcorn and pony rides for kids during their weekend tent event.

As a card carrying member of Ralph’s Club, Vons Club, Albertsons Preferred Club, Smart Advantage (Smart & Final), Costco, CVS, Hallmark and Joe’s Pub, I consider myself a savvy shopper. I’m a Petco Petpal Member and don’t even have a pet. I got closeout tube socks for a buck a pair, store brand Ibuprophin for literally one-third the price of Motrin and it’s all the same since it’s FDA Regulated. But generic ketchup? I think not — Heinz or Hunts all the way. Charmin versus store brand — that’s a close call, depends how sensitive you are down there.

Some choices are clear and some require deeper thought. We walk the aisles comparing items like All Temperature Cheer vs. Detergentia Lavanderia. Which is more likely to remove grime and less likely to cause that nasty lingering rash? What about that all-u-can-eat buffet at your local dinner spot? Is it actually food or an impending case of dysentery? Comparison shopping deserves a four-year degree program in its own right.

I wish there were a mathematical equation for determining whether a deal is really a deal. Half-price sushi sounds great, but once you factor in a bottle of Pepto, doesn’t that level things out? People are emotional. It’s taught in Advertising 101\. We are driven by need and emotion. I “need” to pay my electric bill, but I’d “feel” a lot better with a new pair of Banana Republic jeans.

We all want what we want and, quite often, a good deal will drive us there, but at what price? There are so many scenarios and tastes vary, but some offers just sound sketchy. Keep in mind that I’m a pessimist/realist, so I’ll look for the scam in any ad, but at least my brakes work well and my cupboard is stocked with “Fruit Loops” rather than “Fruity Rounds” or “Berry O’s.”

Always look for the real deal, and beware of smoke and mirrors.

*Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on October 9, 2007.* [Read the original PDF.](https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/smdp%5Fbackissues/100907.pdf?ref=smdp.com)