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# Ways to save gas
- URL: https://www.smdp.com/ways-to-save-gas/
- Published: 2008-06-18T15:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2026-10-25T00:16:27.000Z
- Author: Guest Author
- Tags: Opinion, Santa Monica, #archive-import

*By Steve “the Mailman” Breen Going Postal*

A FEW WEEKS AGO, I SPUN OUT AN article presciently monikered “Everything Costs $5.” I mentioned that a gallon of gas would wind out to 5 bucks.

The day after the Lakers tanked at home during the playoffs, lo and behold, the 76 station next to SMC touted $5.09/gal for top shelf octane. The gas station attendant now wears a ski mask when he takes your money.

I surrendered my use of an automobile in January of 2007\. It’s my personal protest over the war for foreign oil. Nobody should have to fight for a resource that is luxuriantly surfeited in the Gulf of Mexico, the deep shelf off the Left Coast and in the Alaska National Mosquito Reserve.

Of course it doesn’t stop enviro-fascist Brown Shirts from displaying hypocritically hyped bumper stickers on the back of their Land Rovers proclaiming “No War for Oil!” Oh, but what the heck, freedom of speech … it can test ya.

I’d like to personally extend my thanks, however, to all shrub huggers currently stuck in traffic as your addiction to “Texas tea” fattens my stock portfolio and pays for my monthly bus pass. By the end of 2008, I avariciously predict gasoline will be $7/gal so that I may further impoverish the linings of your hempen post consumer waste wallets.

While I know that the burgeoning blow-up doll of inflated fossil fuel economics is as analogous to a crack addict who has just smoked his last rock, far too many folks are far too willing to patronize their petro-dealer du jour for just one more hit. Yet there is a rehab solution to your pollution. Think 12 Step meetings but without the cookies and cigarette breaks. Your sponsor will be “Uncle Sam”

I propose a nationally mandated legislative edict that moves our work force into a 4-day/40 hour workweek. It works one of two ways: 1\. The simplest method is as stated: 4 days at 10 hours/day with no overtime. Overtime is only worked on the fifth day. Otherwise, enjoy your 3-day Margaritaville weekend. 2\. The second method is for a 5-day workweek but Monday is a split shift. Monday is day workers only. The former Monday night workers show up on Friday night. No Friday day workers. Everybody still works his or her usual 10-hour shifts on Tuesday-Thursday. Subsequently the day shifters would have Friday-Sunday off and the night shifters would have Saturday through Monday off. Sweet, yes?

The immediate benefit is a 20 percent decrease in overall fuel consumption as you are commuting to work 20 percent less. This also translates into less pollution, fewer vehicles on the road and, most importantly, commensurate savings.

But let’s take it a step further. Some of you may remember the old odd/even days of the first oil crisis’ in the 1970’s. You could only “fill-er-up” at the pump on the odd days of the month if your license plate ended in an odd number while likewise contrary for even days.

Our new pro-enviro law would state that you could only drive your car on your appropriate day. This feature encourages car-pooling and heavier use of rapid transit while cutting our pollution and traffic in half. Essential “first responders” are exempt from the law. Politicians are not exempt; they aren’t essential. And since there will be less traffic on the roadway, we can go back to driving 55 mph to engender further fuel conservation.

Additionally, if you were caught driving on your non-designated day without a demonstrable medical emergency, your vehicle would be instantly impounded and sold to pay for a new light rail system. The police will drop you off at the nearest rapid transit line as a courtesy.

Naturally there will be the hue and cry about the “right” to drive and to do as we please. Unfortunately, freedom to do as you please without governmental intervention is a decidedly conservative notion.

Liberals love legislating behavior and quality of life issues for others while making speculative movies about speculatively inconvenient truths about themselves rather than crafting a truthfully coherent energy and environmental policy.

The distinct entitlement of utilizing an automobile dovetails nicely with their environmental dystopia.

Yet since we are creatures of comfort, we will not change unless, according to accepted Democratopian dogma, we distill a more draconian potation to be imbibed from the Congressional alembic.

Remember, every vote counts and “Uncle Sam” will be there helping us be that change we’ve been so piously waiting for.

If you seek to disagree with me, you’ll find me on the bus.

STEVE BREEN is a devout apostle of evil oil companies and “the best looking mailman at the Post Office.” He

*Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on June 18, 2008.* [Read the original PDF.](https://s3.us-east-1.amazonaws.com/smdp%5Fbackissues/061808.pdf?ref=smdp.com)