After reading the April Fool’s parodies in the local news yesterday, I wondered why writers resorted to fiction when recent actions by City Hall stand on their own as April Fool’s jokes.
Last week, City Council extended smoking prohibitions to the Santa Monica Pier, beaches and a cigarette butt’s flip-ping distance from municipal bus stops. There was the usual rhetoric from politicians and self-proclaimed guardians of public health about fire dangers, pollution and health hazards from second-hand smoke. (100 yards away on a public beach in a 3-knot wind?) City Hall recently joined a lawsuit against two federal agencies involved in foreign oil projects that allegedly generate carbon dioxide emissions that are leading to global warming — and the eventual destruction of our beaches and our tourist industry.
Holy catastrophe! City Hall makes a federal case about global warming’s effect on our beaches and bluffs 10,000 years from now, but conveniently ignores the detrimental effects a smoking ban and our large, inhospitable vagrant population has on the tourism industry today? I smell a “Green Party” agenda and another pointless Don Quixote-type misadventure like recent failed litigation over ATM fees, which cost us hundreds of thousands of taxpayer dollars.
How about the hundreds of “homeless” who use our parks, streets, alleys and private property as toilets? There’s a wall in the 2400 block of Main St. that is breathtaking, not only for its odor, but the sheer amount of human excrement at its base. This is not a health hazard, or bad for tourism?
We have laws prohibiting public urination and excretion, but with an estimated 1,500 transients here, they’re impossible to enforce. Homeless advocates claim that public restrooms would solve the problem. But between the violently mentally ill and vandals, these facilities are impossible to keep operational and in repair.
How about an ordinance requiring the mostly non-Santa Monica groups that still feed transients in our parks to provide portable toilets so their customers don’t have to relieve themselves on our sidewalks and yards after dining? Naww. The City Council is too busy wasting time on cigarette smoke to deal with something serious.
If City Hall were really concerned about the environment, wouldn’t it be doing something about chimney smoke? There must be tens of thousands of unfiltered, unregulated chimneys that belch smoke from burning wood, paper and who knows what other materials in residential fireplaces on a nightly basis.
It’s why when you take a walk at night, the air smells like burning rubbish. Sometimes there’s so much acrid smoke that eyes sting, noses run and shortness of breath ensues. How can this be good for everyone’s health?
One fireplace fire generates a 100,000 times more pollution than a cigarette. However, no politician will incur the wrath of legions of fireplace owners by outlawing wood burning fireplaces — no matter how much better for all of us and the environment it would be in the end.
Don’t wait for political leaders, environmental advocates or even the self-appointed guardians of public health to tackle fireplace pollution. It’s too big of a fish to swallow. Politicians and do-good-ers always pick on inconsequential targets such as the small percentage of people who still smoke versus a lot of people who enjoy their fireplaces and then brag, “Look what I’ve accomplished.”
It’s all disingenuous, inconsistent, cowardly and hypocritical. City leaders talk the talk but won’t walk the walk. In the end, nothing improves. Meanwhile, someone or some small group loses another freedom, sacrificed by a pointless smokescreen of bogus showboating and political favoritism.
Beating up on an easy target accomplishes nothing. For example, those with more mouth than huevos will call for a ban on “toy guns” rather than take on a real opponent — the firearms industry. Those in charge of controlling vehicle emissions excuse millions of commercial trucks and buses saddling instead the relatively few classic car owners with rigorous inspections and smog controls.
Here, as elsewhere, lip service substitutes for real challenges and hard work. Tough decisions are not made, remedies are never administered and meaningful change doesn’t occur. Only political expediency is served. And, we all pay a heavy price.
Just something to ponder the day after April Fools’ Day. (Bill Bauer is a longtime Santa Monica resident and freelance writer).
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on April 2, 2004. Read the original PDF.