THIS PAST WEEKEND, THE NEWS WAS consumed by a teacher in the Sudan who allowed her charges to name a teddy bear Mohammed. This offended some religious fundamentalists there, so they, of course, did what every fanatic does, and called for her death. Not the death of the students mind you, who actually did the naming. Not the parents of these obvious infidel children, but their teacher.
Personally, I don’t understand this obsession that Islamic fundamentalists have with making sure that no images of Mohammed or no “false idols” be made in his name. It seems to me that with the vast numbers of people who are actually named Mohammed, what’s the big deal about a few kids naming a stuffed teddy bear?
Why are religious fanatics so serious? Honestly, they must have their sense of humor removed as they are blindly following charismatic leaders who must pontificate, proselytize and puff up their own credentials. I don’t understand why the passionate pursuit of religious fervor requires one to have no ability to laugh.
Or, perhaps I have it backwards. Perhaps it is only those people who have no sense of humor, who are congenitally unhappy and morbid who find solace in the slavish devotion to rigid regulation of their life by others.
Frankly, if I’m going to let someone else dictate to me how I should live my life, I prefer that they have a successful marriage, a happy home, an overflowing bank account and a great sense of humor. I’m not going to let some unhappy, bitter, arrogant control freak determine for me how to enjoy the few years that I have on earth.
I’m reminded of the great Tinky Winky scandals of 1999, when that source of all that is hypocritical and self-righteous, the late Jerry Falwell, declared that TW must be the gay Teletubby because he was purple and had a triangle on his head. Which as anyone who knows anything about being gay, is clear proof of one’s gayness.
Then there’s The Wiggles character Jeff — he must be their gay one, because he not only wears a purple shirt, but, also is drawn on their Web site with a lavender kerchief. He might look vaguely like a cowboy, but don’t be fooled. The kerchief is a dead giveaway as code to the gay community.
All of this wouldn’t be so appalling and horrifying if it only ended at an uptight preacher trying to fortify his flock of followers, but it doesn’t. It enrages people and makes them do insanely stupid things. It is this intolerance that leads to lynchings, to rubber tires being drenched in gasoline and put on people who are then burned to death, in the name of all that is holy.
It is this type of religious rabblerousing that leads young men and women to decide that their life is best used, as a portable bomb. That they can serve no greater purpose on this earth than to strap on some dynamite, or C4, and walk into a crowded bus station and blow it up.
It is this type of religious fervor that drives people to murder medical personnel who perform abortions.
In America, we have tolerance for just about anything you want to write, say, and make into a movie. We have the tolerance for those who want to criticize that which other people write and say.
Currently, “The Golden Compass” is in the crosshairs of the religious fundamentalists in our country who want to denounce this work of children’s fiction for its’ allegedly anti-Christian message.
Teddy bears, kids movies and a giant purple blob — this is what the religious fanatics of the world are fighting about.
Not the 33 million people with AIDS and how to help them; not the 2.2 million Iraqi refugees, nor the millions of Africans who have been displaced, raped, butchered and murdered throughout the continent.
Religion, like most things, can be used for good or evil purposes. I suppose, on balance, that more good is done than bad. It just seems though, that the bad is so bad, and so avoidable, and so laughable at times, that it colors the whole idea of religion as being a net good.
It seems sad to me that with all the work that needs to be done in this world, that anyone would spend their time worrying about such trivial matters as what is the name of a teddy bear, or how a children’s character is dressed.
No, they worry about fictional characters. Because their all powerful God, who is not fictional, just really dislikes being made fun of.
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on December 4, 2007. Read the original PDF.