By PATRICIA BUCHTER is a mother of two. She
THE CALIFORNIA STATE LEGISLATURE IS considering a law that would prohibit parents from “spanking” their children. Can somebody better define “spanking,” please? I can’t say that I am an advocate for spanking children, and I do believe in exploring alternative methods to spanking, but I am not sure I want my state legislature telling me how to discipline my toddler. What’s next?
As a parent, I have already experienced the loss of some decision-making, which I felt was a parent’s right. I know it is important to educate your child, but shouldn’t parents have a “say” in when they educate their children regarding things like AIDS, sex education and the use of condoms? We, as parents, no longer have control of what are children are exposed to. We are no longer in the “driver’s seat,”so to speak, when it comes to exposing our children to certain information. I do understand that certain topics need to be covered in school, especially since parents may or may not be doing it at home, but whatever happened to “age appropriateness” — something I personally would like to have a “say” in?
As a parent, I could go off on a million other tangents, including the violence and crude language on our children’s video games to discussing condom use in our schools, but does anyone else feel this way? I know the world is changing and our children are being exposed to things that, as children, were non-issues for us, but I still feel as an active parent that I do not want to be dictated to by the state or any other governing authority regarding the raising of my children.
I understand that the law is there, in many cases, to protect, and do feel that the health and welfare of children should be protected under all circumstances, but how exactly will this law be enforced? Laws are already in place to protect children against abuse, although they could be better, but is a slap on the hand to a toddler abuse? Will we be afraid to correct our children in public places for fear of retaliation and the thought of possibly losing them if reported? How will this law be monitored in the home?
The California State Legislature hopes that cracking down on spanking will, in the end, crack down on violence and crime in this country. The U.S. crime rate is higher than ever and I don’t think it’s a result of toddlers being spanked!
We, as parents, are not disciplining as we did in the past, and this very well may be the reason behind the increase in crime and violence. Many of us were spanked when we were younger and we’re not on the streets committing crimes. No, in fact, many of us have a greater sense of respect for our elders, including our teachers and our parents, who administered discipline along the way.
Spanking isn’t always an answer, but a parent needn’t be scrutinized under the law for what they deem appropriate punishment for a child’s misbehavior. How far will this go?
Fellow parents, we need to step up to the plate and say “enough!”Don’t let our government dictate how we should raise or not raise our children. Strengthen our laws against abuse of children and empower our child protective agencies so that abuse of children ends in this country.
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on January 30, 2007. Read the original PDF.