By Mark Marchillo Odd Man Out
“I’M NOT DOING CHRISTMAS THIS YEAR. I can’t do Christmas single,” my friend told me at Baja Cantina the other night. The place was busy as usual and our waitress was struggling at the next table over. A older Hispanic gentleman had ordered a margarita. “Do you want salt?” she asked. No comprende. “Salt?” Nope. “SALT.” Lots of bitter conviction went into that last one. We cracked up and that was the end of our holiday conversation.
Single and alone on Christmas, which is nothing new to most of us. What’s hard are holidays once you’ve experienced what so many fortunate couples have had. Boyfriend in tow, to the parents’ house, sharing gifts, playing in the snow in the mountains. But when that’s no more, to bare the holidays single-handedly again seems too horrifying. Wrist meet scalpel.
I went to a child’s birthday party on Sunday. Parties in L.A. are so wonderfully overdone. This 1-year-old had five cakes. Happy boy. I mean me. And as I looked around at all of the staright couples, I didn’t feel resentful. Sometimes I do, when I see how the straighties make it work. But this time I felt something else. Something hot, in my chest. Like a consoling warmth. It was inspiration. People can do it. They can meet and fall in love and live happily. Maybe not ever after, I dunno if that happens anymore. But they can share life. Haters at bay, I think we can do it, too.
I’m an old softy when it comes to the finer things: A careless walk in the woods; holding hands; snuggling on a Sunday morning; or three hundred and twelve white daisies sitting on a doorstep. So whatever that means to you, in your time here. The little things. So important.
Maybe this is nonsense, or something worse — cornball. But put your dreams of money and fat shedding aside this holiday season. Buy yourself a little of the good life: Someone’s time. No, not a stripper. And live a little. It’s just the simple things, two people together. But it’s what’s poppin’ I assure you. On everyone’s mind. It’s worth gold. It’s worth a piece of you. Because it’s what’s true.
These are the things we have left, all we remember someday, after time steals the rest away.
MARK MARCHILLO is a freelance filmmaker and all-together nice guy living in Santa Monica. Send comments or suggestions regarding his column to
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on November 17, 2007. Read the original PDF.