Kids tell adults how they feel about violence
If there is one message Santa Monica kids want to send to adults it’s this: pay attention to your children.
That’s what kids told elected officials, parents and school administrators Tuesday night at a “youth speak out on violence prevention.”
Nearly 100 people filled the Santa Monica High School cafeteria to address youth violence in Santa Monica, partly in response to the murder of Deanna Maran, 15, who was stabbed at a party in Westwood on Nov. 17.
At the event’s introduction, Santa Monica City Council members, school officials, police and parents stood up in front of the students and told them they were there to listen to them.
Dozens of students broke out into small groups and were asked to answer a list of questions relating to violence. They shared their thoughts with adults in the room and came up with solutions to work toward.
But students warned their elders to actually take what they had to say and put it into practice. Too often, events like a “youth speak out” are forgotten about within months and solutions are not followed up on, students said.
Judy Abdo, the facilitator of the speak-out, asked that adults stand up at the end of the gathering and commit to the kids what they will do to help end youth violence. Then each person was asked to think of at least one thing they could do as individuals to help curb violence in the community. Participants walked away with small plans, as well as big ones.
The suggestion that sparked the most conversation came from a student who suggested a youth retreat. Many adults and youth jumped at the chance to be part of the event, possibly planned for spring.
Teachers and administrators from the Santa Monica Malibu Unified School District, which sponsored the event, were pleased with the turnout given that it was the first day of a new semester and students had a long weekend because Monday was a day off for them.
What teacher Joy Bramlette noticed at the tables where students were working from in small groups was that the kids chose strangers to sit with.
“These kids are not friends at these tables,” she observed. “They came up to each other and introduced themselves.”
The students presented their thoughts by posting large sheets of paper along the wall with their ideas outlined on them. One by one, each group explained why violence happens and how to deal with it.
Some said it was the easy access to drugs and alcohol; others said youth violence happens because people fight for power. Some said violence is a result of misunderstandings and kids don’t take it seriously until it hits close to home.
“I believe that they really don’t want to get involved until something very serious happens to them or someone close to them,” one student wrote.
The debate among city council members and city officials surrounded what the adult’s role is in fostering respect and kindness in children.
They all agreed that many parents fail in playing the “authority role” and as a result, they are letting their children down. Instead, parents need to spend more time with their kids and send the message that they are there for them.
Jose Lopez said he grew up in the hood and has seen plenty of violence around him. The kids he grew up with only knew how to express their feelings through violence and drugs.
“I’ve seen a lot of destruction and I’m tired of it,” he told the group. “A lot of it has to do with anger within themselves... If you are mad at somebody and you are loaded, you never know what is going to happen.”
That could have possibly been the case when Maran, the Santa Monica High School sophomore, was stabbed after she confronted a 15-year-old girl who was breaking potted plants at a party in November. The girl allegedly called her older sister who arrived a short time later and with the help of other party goers, pinned Maran down while she was kicked and then stabbed.
The violent end to Maran’s life still haunts her family, friends, fellow students and her teachers. But events like Tuesday’s are a step in the right direction of ending youth violence, teachers say.
“The kids are moving forward in a positive way,” Bramlette said. “Obviously we see they are at different levels.”
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on January 31, 2002. Read the original PDF.