DOWNTOWN Sandra Moore doesn’t consider herself a failure, but whenever she takes a drag on her cigarette, she does feel a tinge of guilt for not following through with her plan to stop smoking.
She made the promise to herself nearly a year ago while dancing and drinking with friends at a Santa Monica bar during their New Year’s Eve celebration, just after she finished singing “Auld Lang Syne.” Like millions of Americans, Moore felt compelled that night to make a resolution to kick the habit. And just like those millions, she quickly gave in to temptation and started puffing away.
“It was really hard,” Moore said as she walked down Broadway on her way to the Third Street Promenade in the days before New Year’s. “I was really determined. I started to notice that smoking was affecting my health and was getting to be really expensive, so I made a conscious effort to give it up.
“Then it was kind of like reality set in and it became a lot harder than I thought it would,” Moore, 32, added. “Once I bought that first pack, I just became easier and easier to let my resolution die.”
Quitting smoking is one of the most popular New Year’s resolutions a person makes, right along with taming the bulge, cutting down credit card debt and spending more time with family and friends. It is also one of the most difficult to realize.
Most resolutions are for that matter, breeding cynicism about the tradition many follow, which is to promise to make some positive change in one’s life at the start of a new year.
“I don’t believe in it,” said Bryan Burciaga, a local resident. “I think it’s ridiculous to make these grand statements about changing your life just because it’s a new year. Why not change your life for the better when you notice yourself getting out of control? And then to do it on a night when you probably aren’t thinking clearly. It just seems like a big joke to me, kind of like something to do because it’s tradition. It’s lost its meaning.”
Burciaga has a point. Studies have shown that 50 percent of people give up on their resolutions by March and fall back into old habits. For some, failing to follow through can become a burden, pushing them further into depression or apathy, said professional life coach Marie Elena Rigo, president of MEI Life Designs in Santa Monica.
“True Vision” — IT IS IMPORTANT TO REALIZE THAT FAILURE WILL BE APART OF THAT PLAN, BUT THAT DOESN’T MEAN YOU GIVE UP.” Allison Schwartz, Life coach and the author of the e-book
“Making resolutions does come with a lot of pressure for people,” Rigo said. “It should be a process that you work on throughout the year, with very specific goals that are attainable. Many times people set goals that are unrealistic and when they don’t achieve them, they end up judging themselves harshly and that can be even worse.”
Instead of making resolutions, Rigo recommends making intentions that are broken up into manageable chunks. It is also important to have a plan on how to achieve certain goals. It is one thing to say you would like to spend more time with family, but how will you achieve that goal?
“Once you have a plan in place, it is important to realize that failure will be a part of that plan, but that doesn’t mean you give up,” said life coach Allison Schwartz, the author of “True Vision,” an e-book that teaches how to use visualization, an effective tool that athletes often use to succeed.
“You are going to have challenges along the way,” Schwartz said. “Everything is not going to go perfectly. You are human. The important thing is to just get back on track. A lot of people give up because they make a mistake, but that’s part of it.”
There are clear ways to succeed, and they include getting friends and family members involved, setting achievable goals and rewarding yourself along the way, Schwartz said.
Resolution maker Haley Cummings is committed to paying of her credit card bills and getting back into shape after a long layoff because of the holidays. She says she’s prepared and willing to make the commitment to saving money, which means going out less on the weekends and eating more at home.
“Both kind of go together,” Cummings, 26, said of her resolutions. “By not going out as much, I can save money and have more time to go to the gym. I’ll also be eating a lot more at home so that will save money and help me stay on my diet. For me, having them sort of relate to one another, I think, will help me in the long run because I will be getting double the benefit.”
And if she doesn’t succeed, there’s always next year.
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on January 1, 2008. Read the original PDF.