By Erik Smith Santa Monica
(Re: “Smacking down spanking,” Dear Dorie, Feb. 27, page 10) I am 23 years old, was raised in Nebraska and had a paddle with my name written on it. So did my brother. And we’re proof that spanking does work, if administered appropriately. True, spanking is not effective if it is a “panic spasm,” because the parents “lost it,” as you said. But you also said that in any situation resulting in a spanking you won’t find a rational adult contemplating his or her decision.
False. When I did something severely wrong, I was told to get my paddle. My parents would then discuss with me how many swats this offensive deserved. My father usually wanted many more, but my mother would convince him that a lower number would suffice. While I thought I deserved none! They would then ask me why I was receiving this spanking. I usually denied my wrongdoing at first, but with threats of adding swats I would soon admit that I had lied, stolen, cheated or whatever. I then received the decided number of swats.
Afterwards, my parents would look me in the eye and explain to me that they didn’t hit me out of anger, they hit me out of love. My butt may have been sore. But my “oh-so-sensitive self-esteem” was still intact and I sure thought twice about acting badly!
Yes, there is a fine line between effective spanking and child abuse. But there are people who use spanking as an appropriate and effective tool.
Thank you for spanking me, Mom and Dad.
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on March 1, 2007. Read the original PDF.