THIRD STREET PROMENADE — Thousands of miles and decades removed from her upbringing in Japan, Eriko Suzuki still feels the emotional sting of being spanked by her mother.
Now a mother herself, Suzuki, who resides in West Los Angeles, uses life experience when it comes to raising her 6-month-old daughter. “I disagree with spanking,” Suzuki said on Monday, while strolling with her daughter on the promenade. “My mother spanked me and I still remember how shocked I felt.”
If the State of California has any say in it, there may be no more children left feeling the way Suzuki felt after getting a hard taste of her mother’s hand.
Within the next two weeks, Assemblywoman Sally Lieber (D- Mountain View) is expected to introduce legislation that would make it a misdemeanor for parents to slap, spank or hit a child under 4 years of age. The maximum penalty is a one-year prison sentence and/or $1,000 fine. Sanctions could also include mandatory parenting and anger management classes.
“We felt strongly that these very small children are the least likely to come into contact with other adults and, just by virtue, are sitting ducks for an abusive adult,” Lieber said on Monday. “Just about everyone believes we have laws against child abuse that are working well and, in fact, the law in this area is very gray.”
Adults can basically discipline children however they deem fit, as long as the action is not considered to be “unjustifiable,” according to current state law. Confusion over the law has caused some prosecutors to ask for clarification from state legislators.
But Child Development Specialist Rose Selesnick, who offers parenting classes on the Westside, disagrees with the proposed legislation. Though she believes that children shouldn’t be spanked, Selesnick also doesn’t think the state can legislate what goes on in the home.
“I like to see a system where parents have to go through parenting classes while they’re pregnant,” said Selesnick, of Marina del Rey, on Monday.
Child specialists on the Westside appear to agree that spanking is not the most effective method to teach a child right from wrong.
It’s a disciplinary practice that can be both emotionally and mentally damaging for a child, according to Selesnick. The controversial method also makes children angry and redemptive, and instills in them the belief that violence is a way to solve problems.
Once considered to be a conventional method of discipline, corporal punishment is now thought by many to be outdated. Still, there are many parents who slap, hit or spank a child when they are up to no good.
“There are people with three or four kids and have no help and no husband to help them, and they get frustrated,” Selesnick said. “They’re the kind of parent who said ‘my father beat the hell out of me and I turned out OK.’”
Spanking might provide a short-term solution in stopping a child in their tracks of wrongdoing, but amid the emotions of anger and humiliation of being spanked, the child forgets their lesson, said Elaine Rodino, a Santa Monica-based psychologist.
“The lesson never happens,” she said. “It’s not successful in terms of teaching a better way or having the child not do that again.”
Some experts say parents can usually have one free pass to spank their child. That one free pass should only be used if the toddler is doing something that would endanger their life, such as running onto the street unsupervised, said Edith Spain, a professor and former chairwoman of the Early Childhood Education Program at Santa Monica College.
“If you have the certificate to spank once in a lifetime, that would be the one time,” Spain said.
Next fall, Spain will teach a new course at SMC on managing challenging child behaviors. Corporal punishment will be covered in the curriculum.
If a child is scribbling on the wall, the parent should tell the child to help clean up the writing on the wall. Children have good intentions, especially at a young age. They haven’t been on the planet long enough to know what is right and what is wrong, according to Spain.
Many specialists are against the concept of “time out,” saying it leaves children alone when they really need their parents’ help and attention.
“We don’t do time outs anymore in good childcare centers,” Spain said. “In marginal ones, they do. It’s quick, it’s easy, but it doesn’t create lasting behavior.”
The effectiveness of a time out depends on how it is executed by parents.
“It can be done in a way that can be harsh and very upsetting and mortifying and not teaching a lesson of what should be done,” Rodino said. “The best thing to do is re-engage the child in doing something that’s better.”
Taking away a child’s favorite toy or object is only effective if the item is involved in the child’s bad manner. For example, if a young boy is throwing a toy truck at his sister, parents should take the toy away.
Otherwise, parents should sit down with their children and discuss what they expect out of them.
“Mostly, kids do what they do because they don’t know any other way,” Selesnick said.
Originally published in the Santa Monica Daily Press print edition on January 30, 2007. Read the original PDF.